So now my homework’s ripped to shreds and full of slimy goo. I’m going to dump it on your desk if I don’t get an A. “My dog chewed up my homework” is a common excuse used by students who don’t turn in their homework.He visits schools, because he loves hanging out with kids (unfortunately, his grandchildren live in Sweden, so he only sees them once a year).I knew I couldn’t write a story about a dog eating homework — much too cliché — so I thought a snake eating everything in sight could be funny.
So please bag your rattlers and give a sibilant salute to the author of today’s hiss-erific poem “A Snake Ate My Homework” — (Can’t see the video? I chased it to my brother’s room; it headed straight for Pete.
A snake ate all my homework, Ma’am, I swear to you, it’s true. It ate his high-top sneakers and the socks right off his feet.
I got the idea for my picture book (see below) when the sentence “You’ll never believe what I saw at the zoo! Another story I wrote from a sentence I heard in my head is started with that one line and grew from there.
I thought it had the perfect rhythm for a rhyming picture book.
In fact, if my boss weren’t such a snake in the grass, I might even call in with some sort of excuse, like indigestion ( try swallowing a deer whole).
But no, I slunk over to my desk, cheered only by the fact that we can all slide into a new week with a bit of verse from the Habitual Rhymer herself.It gobbled up Pete’s football pants, his soccer shirt and shorts, His baseball bat and catcher’s mitt (I guess the snake likes sports). My dad slipped-slided, gave a yelp, and wrapped up in a towel, but not before the snake escaped, so Dad joined in the prowl. We have to catch that snake before it swallows any more.” Suddenly, I thought of how I’d get my homework back.It slunk into the bathroom; poor Dad was in the tub. We tracked it to the kitchen; it had opened up the fridge. I gathered the supplies I’d need to launch my sneak attack.I decided to give it a try, and since this was back in the day before the Internet, I never realized there was a whole kidlit world out there!I wrote and submitted for a couple of years, with no publishing success.Now, given that the teacher cannot dispute these things, isn’t it plausible that you are telling the truth?Why would you have used such a cliche if it wasn’t the truth? Animals Biography Birds Books Cats Colors Dancing Dogs Family Fish Food Free Verse Haiku Halloween History Holidays Home Humorous Insects Love Mammals Mathematics Mollusks Monster Music Nature Ocean Onomatopoeia People Pets Poetry Reptiles Rhyming School Science Seasons Sleep Spooky Sports Technology Water Weather Wordplay Words Writing by Bruce Lansky I’m glad to say my homework’s done. Altogether he has written or edited 20 humorous poetry and song books which have sold about 4 million copies..pass_color_to_child_links a.u-inline.u-margin-left--xs.u-margin-right--sm.u-padding-left--xs.u-padding-right--xs.u-absolute.u-absolute--center.u-width--100.u-flex-align-self--center.u-flex-justify--between.u-serif-font-main--regular.js-wf-loaded .u-serif-font-main--regular.amp-page .u-serif-font-main--regular.u-border-radius--ellipse.u-hover-bg--black-transparent.web_page .u-hover-bg--black-transparent:hover. The only things it didn’t eat were Mother’s snacks for bridge. I grabbed a jar of pepper and a box fan from upstairs. The sneeze was so gigantic that it knocked me to the ground, and everything came flying out; it scattered all around. Lori: who are you, where are you, and how long have you been a rhyming fool?I aimed it at the snake and said, “I hope you said your prayers! I found this on the neighbor’s lawn; I’m here at school on time. I live in a northern suburb of Chicago with my husband, John, my two dogs, Pippa and Tucker, and my two sons, Sean and Brian (when they come back to visit).